Where's my sunshine.

Took some time off from studying for Term Test to blog . I guess it's only right that I stopped suppressing how I'm feeling and then I could concentrate in my studies well. I can't seem to perk myself up in any ways.
 :(

 For once , i hate all the commitments, all the responsibility , all the duties, all the opportunities given. I DON'T WANT THEM ALL. I want to leave the school with purely just a good O level cert and start anew in Poly. Perhaps, I'm just being foolish or crazy by thinking this way or whatever people might think but  I don't care.I don't see any point , reasons and motivation for me to do those things back then.  Nobody will understand this shitty feeling. I know I'm being a coward stepping back , withdrawn myself from everything everyone. Trust me , I don't want this either.Due to the environment, my mindset changed for the betterment of myself. . I want to stand up for what I want to do but not what I have to do. Nobody can force me to do something I don't like to.

 I couldn't get over myself and I hate that part of me. SIGH.