Hi readers, I've always wanted to unlock my blog the minute I private them. HAHA. Been feeling kind of empty not typing down my thoughts and let them linger around me so often. These days of privating my blog really let me had a better manage of myself in terms of emotions. I learn not to let it all run wild because I control them after all blog is still a public thing , I do not want to expose too much out of respect.
I'm going to sum up my 2013 in this post that you're going to read. Indeed, this year pass really fast and there's too much to say them all. Good and bad things happened concurrently that I find myself on board of a roller coaster ride, everything is just too fast that I'm caught off guard sometimes. However, I learn the hard way and I'm still a believer that good things fall apart for better things to take place. I'll still hold that close.
I still remember going back to sec 5 wasn't that smooth sailing at all and it is definitely not the best decision that I had to make. I won't forget the months with the girls above that I'm going to dedicate to. Days in school couldn't get better without the support from them. From awkwardness to bitching about then to craziness. I miss the four of us a lot. The same routine that we used to do in school.
I miss how we always rush down to chop seats in the canteen.
I miss how we skip our lunch staying in class at the four corners of the room because that is how we sat back then.
I miss how we always tease each other and laugh together feeling happy
I miss how we comfort each other when our results are not what we expected.
I miss how we sat on the wooden bench with Mr Low consoling us that things will get better.
I miss how I uprightly scold her bitch without afraid that she will get mad .
I miss how that bitch assured me countless of times no matter how annoying I am because I only finish 2 math questions for hours.
I miss how I scold Vanessa and still tell her liyan love you.
I miss how the four of us sit together and the only time that we're quiet is when we are eating hungrily
I miss how we love to eat the Malay stall drumsticks after PE lesson.
I miss how we work hard together during night study without fail.
I miss how I used to rely on the bitch each time I want to find someone to confide my feelings to.
I miss how we can always talk about random things that came across our mind
I miss how we say our flaws and strength to each other.
I miss Vanessa being all retarded and she never fails to make me smile.
I miss how they paste post sticks on my tables telling me to cheer up or just to tease me.
The list just goes on and on.
'I used to' was what I told someone when she ask if I'm happy in school. I told her without hesitation that it was a YES. I really love and enjoy school because of them . Right now, everything feels like it falling a part. Unexpected things happened. I'm learning to face them all right now. No matter how much I want to scream and shout I know that it is all pointless. Everything won't be the same no matter how hard you try to fix it, I just know that I'm hurt to the bottom pit and each time I got hurt , I build stronger walls around me that it is hard for anyone to get pass. If by any chance you are reading this, I want to say that I wish you well, happiness and I give you my blessings sincerely.
These group of guys are the ones that I spend time with for years. It's a big clique and I'm most comfortable with them around. It is really heartwarming to see them all grown up to young mature mans. haha. Love how they include us in their picture more often each outings and we can talk about anything . We tease joke and make fun of each other knowing that those were all jokes. Each time we suggest an outing, they would always try their best to make it which is what I am always thankful about. Spending time with them makes me happy and moments spend with them make me understand the definition of" family" without any blood relations better. I know that no matter which route we are taking, we will always be the same. Meeting up and just have fun especially eating buffets ! hahaha *insert hearts*
The darlings that been through the most with me. How could I ever forget about them being by my side when the times get tough. They are the best girls with me so far. Those bonds that we shared isn't just anyone can break them. Even though we don't always meet up together but the relationships we had always stay strong the moment we see each other. Those bonds are magically special and considering that we had gone through so much, I have total faith that they are a keeper. Can't wait to see the three of us getting old and have wrinkles all over our faces years to come ;')
Wonderful team for years. This is not all the people in the team but they are the best teammates I could ever find . I can always remember the times with them, training , arguments and fighting for victory. They make my secondary school life a memorable one and I have never regretted joining basketball with them around. They play a huge role in my heart and they will forever be my NO.1 teammates regardless of whether I'm joining other sports or not. Nothing could beat our bonds and of course our tradition of annual steamboat together on Christmas eve / countdown :')
Can't comprehend how much I miss this boy and I even dream about him last night that I spend time with him just like the past. Always find it amazing how I hated talking to him the most yet I find myself approaching him more than often. I constantly tell my friends how much I hate him and that I can't stand him being annoying but he is my best listener and my best tolerant. Hardly any guys out there could actually tolerate my temper because I suck at controlling them but he did . He accept it all and still be my friend no matter how much I blow my top at him. I really really miss him yet I can't do anything about it. I could still feel the heartache at the airport when I hug him so close to me. It feels like someone close to me is distancing himself away from me , that's why I cried, that's why I can't bear to leave him. Can't forget how he always manage to find me crying quietly at a spot in school and never be afraid to lend me his shoulder to cry on. His words always lingers around me and he is one of the closest ones that I share things with the most. No matter how long time brings me , I will wait patiently for the day he come back from studying and become a better person.
STUPID KRISHNAN, ANNOYING IRRITATING AND HE SUCK. Those words are what I always scold him for and I'm amaze by our relationship. How I always vent my anger on him and how I always tell him things that he don't understand. HAHA. I remembered how I told him he suck because he don't know how to comfort me when I need him to the most. I really hate how he is always a neutral party and thinking on the shoes of others. He still suck right now but no matter what , he is the best to me. I know that he is truthful and hold his principles close. He would never do things recklessly and the positive mindset he always have makes me guilty. I'm guilty because I can't be like him, can't be always happy, can't be positive enough to believe that everything will be alright. Sometimes it gets hard but he always have a way of making me laugh genuinely. With him around , it make me believe that people don't change no matter what the circumstances is because he won't. I have absolute faith in him and that he could do much more soon to come. Can't wait to see him shine brighter in his sports. :)
11 years of friendship already. I got sick of how my father always want her to be my sister-in-law . HAHA. I got sick of how my father always compare me to her . I also got sick of how my father always praise her in front of me saying that she is prettier. Hahaha. I really love her so much., she has this special place in my heart that no one could destroy it . No matter how long we didn't meet up, we will always find a way back to each other . She probably knows my personality well and no words could describe how dear she mean to me. I see Friendship Forever with her by my side. I believe she's going to be the one that stays in my life forever
Was packing my room the morning and I found all the letters that he gave it to me each year without fail . He wrote on a valentine day card that "Even though, I am not your valentine, I will always, always be here for you " this is what he wrote to me. Reading all his cards never fails to bring tears to my eyes. I wonder if what he ever said in the past is still countable right now. I really doubt so. This person I'm going to dedicate to always has a special place in my heart no matter what our r/s is or even what he think of me right now. He seen my worst , he seen me break down in front of him, he knows me so well at the tip of his fingers. All the things he had done for me I can never afford to forget them. Even though there are more heartbreaks than usual right now , nothing would change how important he is or even 100 years down the road. A blessing or a lesson for us , I really don't know but what I can say is that we both grown up. I see how much you've grown , from a reckless hot tempered young boy to a mature and sensible guy. I feel myself being too reliant on him that's why I got hurt the most each time we quarrel. I cared that's why I get jealous, I cared so much that he is more than often what I always think about . Always love to read his message first thing in the morning back then because he is the first that came into my mind. No one would understand how deep my love for him is so much so that I compromise it all. Letting him go is never easy from the beginning because I don't know how to separate from the ones I love the most. I can't tell anyone else. And so I cried all by myself. We're over, we're finished but only memories of good times and love pop out. The more and more I tried to erase them , the longer the days get . But the thing that hurts the most is that I don't think he is even thinking about me. I'm doing this all by myself. That person has already forgotten all about me and is now happy. You really wish you were dead but you don't have the courage all because you're afraid you won't see him again..
Well, heartbreaks are all over, I've become cleaner and 2014 is the time where I could start afresh and move forward , really putting him behind me this time.Thanks for the love and care you had once given me . All I can say is that you will be someone very important to me deep down inside my heart always, in fact an unforgettable one.I give you my blessings.
TANHUIXIAN. I never thought someone could be as tough as she is, no matter how much I tried to break my relations with her , she still stay firmly on. That is what touched me the most. Our friendship doesn't come by easy and I'm glad that we had the big quarrels because it make us cherish the friendship we had more. I couldn't find some one's personality so close to mine other than hers. It's amazing how we think the same thing and how we share the same views most of the time. 'Putting others before us' is always what we tell each other. Both of us always end up getting so tired from all the little things we have done for people special to us secretly. We always suffer together. I not sure how the days ahead will be like, but I hope this sister friendship of ours can keep for as long as possible . She is indeed someone special and definitely deserve to be happy, so I really wish that the year of 2014 could spare her mercy and probably make things right so that she don't have to suffer so much mentally and emotionally .
My precious baobei of all times. Really love her that no words could describe how important she is to me . I often tell my friends that Alicia is everything. She can be my listening ear , she can be my advisor , she can be my sister , literally any role I want her to be in. Whenever I ask her out , she would try her best not to reject me because she knows how much I needed someone back then. I won't forget the comfortable silence I shared with her when both of us are not in the mood. No words could replace how dear she is to me. She is the best , now and forever. I just know that our friendship will go on and I know that both of us will be happier in 2014. I hope she is because she deserve to be happy.
Finally , I hold my special last dedications to THE BFF!<3 I really didn't expect both of us to become such a good friends . Even though our friendship is still 'young' , I just had the special chemistry with her. I know that she is someone needed to protect , needed to be extremely cared for. I won't stop showing my care and concern for her because this is what I like to do. Seeing her happy makes me even happier. She is so bubbly cute around me and she is constantly staying around me without me noticing. I really love talking to her because she understands me the most. No matter what I had to do or face in my life, she is always the one that would say she is with me . The support I gain from her is always something I appreciate knowing that I always had her behind my back. Both of us seldom quarrels but when we do, it is really HUGE even though it is just a minor issue. I had to admit I tend to overreact because I care for her a lot that's why I get disappointments and hurt. Those tough times I'm facing couldn't get easier without her by my side. I swear she has a way of making me feel better. I have trust in our friendship that it is going to go on a long way. I told her that no matter what mistakes she had to make, I would still forgive her because I still want to keep her in my life now and forever. She is irreplaceable as always, I promise.
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May 2014 be a good year for me , for my love ones good health, good relations and good academic.
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