Learning to be human.

I came into realization that many of the things I do, is not about the competition, is not about proving to others that I can do this much. I think many of us have spent our lives lifting up to the world's expectations that we often lose ourself along the way. II struggle 3 out of 4 in my life just to be the best, and to give my 101%effort just to make sure that I'm on track with the rest of the people. I am not smart but hardworking. I look up to different people a lot, be it their appearance or charisma. I often get very affected by who I am, what I am doing with my life seeing what the rest are doing. I compare and then most of the time I am always at the losing end. I don't understand why am I pulling myself down, why am I treating 'myself' in such a bad manner. Even though I'm lacking in a lot of aspects, I don't think I deserve to be treated this way. I guess I got to accept that I am not always the best, there are times when I lose , times when I learn. I should not be bothered by the judgemental world but be myself. Happiest girls are the prettiest and I want to be happy , to be pretty in my own ways. I accept that I tend to feel inferior but I'm gonna pick myself up afterwards. 

Got to be so much stronger mentally for myself.