Sometimes I stared at the wall and think so much that I start to get afraid, worried and upset of things that are either long gone or will never resurface again. My thoughts can run very wildly and sometimes even make me recall sad & dumb things that had happened in the past.
Time check: 7.30pm
Currently on the way to boonlay to meet my darlings. Pretty excited for the night because this means my long dreaded day has passed!! Spending the night with them and back to school the next morning!
Very glad that it wasn't as awkward or stress as it used to be. Honestly I'm afraid of what people might think of me. I don't know when should I voice out, when should I smile or even socialize. These simple things are so hard on me. Even though poly has change me a little but sometimes I do want to be inside my comfort zone. That's why I'm afraid that my ability is not there to be part of the OC the second time or that people might ask why am I so quiet and so forth. FYI, I am not quiet at all if you are a good friend of mine you should know how bitchy, loud and sacarstic I can get with them!
When I wasn't selected as GL yet again, hovering in my mind was "failure and more failure" then the next moment I receive a text to be part of the OC for the first camp i really not sure if it was based on my ability or just a way of pity since two of my good friends were selected as GLs.
This time, I actually opt for being a camper instead, I'm quite surprise they want me to be the OC. Hopefully me agreeing to their request is a right choice because so far it was enjoyable and that I'm closer to most of them thanks to the first camp. I really suck at facing disappointment, so I hope it will be another enjoyable camp together with a few juniors:) In addition, I'm pretty excited to be one of the scarers for the haunted house!
No comments:
Post a Comment